Tuesday, 27 May 2008

What splendid boots, madam, where did you find them?

It's quite an odd feeling to open a splash page for a new site and see a woman wearing some awesome boots and taking a couple of seconds to think "Hang on - I've got a pair like that. The bitch! I've never seen anyone else wearing them!" and then realising that the bitch in question is actually yourself.

Ok, so perhaps it's not a feeling I'd expect that many of my readers to have, but I assure you, it's quite odd.:)

So seemingly Vixen Ladies have a new sister site to add to their family - Vixen Ladies HD - with the HD meaning High Definition, as opposed to Hot Derrieres, or Hurty Discipline. ;)

I've had a quick glance over the previews, and one of the vids features an excerpt from the virgin hand tawsing I told you about. I'm really quite nice about it, although don't be fooled by Mr L's smiling - you could probably lash him with a wire brush and he'd still grin afterwards! :)

Friday, 16 May 2008

Episode 405: In which Amy doesn't get spanked?!

Once again I find myself traversing the country and utilising NXEC's splendid, if vastly temperamental, wi-fi.

"Ah! She has no excuse for not updating the blog if she has 5 hours!" You may say...

Not so.
Not only is the connection about as reliable as a rottweiler guarding a butchers, there's the problem of having highly unsuitable fellow passengers sat in viewing distance: (and in this I include minors and nuns, who appear to be reserved in seats next to me an awful lot) I quite like looking at things like Northern Spanking when people of a nervous disposition are nearby. Or people who are furrowing their brows and brushing down their stiff suits, casting the odd disapproving glance at the way the small blonde with a large cleavage has taken over half the table with her laptop, clearly not using it to merge the Davis Account, or finalise my breakfast meeting with Helen from Sears-Gibbons tomorrow morning.

Ho hum...

There's also the more problematic issue that wherever Amy goes, Chaos will follow. This is not a boast of my naughty brat skills, or a rebellious claim to show off. I am a small blonde Harbinger of Dooom. With three "o"s for emphasis.

From being caught up in Terrorist Attacks at airports, and emergency stops on trains, and buses complete with knifed drunks attempting to hijack. People actively avoid traveling with me because they know something will happen.
Don't get me wrong, sometimes it's as minor as opening a bottle of water and it exploding all over me and the surrounding seats, or hideous small children on the rampage, or just the joy of sharing a carriage with people who escaped the Common Sense gene distribution and start very British fights over seat reservations, like today.

Oh, or being locked in the toilet. Or, in fact, breaking the toilet (which has happened twice now) and the resulting alarm going off meaning that the guard has had to break in to rescue me.

Lucy says I should make a whole new blog about my traveling adventures. I could update it with establishments - or towns - I've been banned from (often along with, say, the Kane Kuties...), toilets I have broken and people I have clubbed to a messy death with their phone for having over-loud, entirely unnecessary conversations.

The Amy-mobile is also more than adept at wreaking havoc. Usually either in new and amusing repairs that it needs or because it's the wrong colour for a city very much involved in sectarian affairs. Last night I took a wrong turn and ended up in not only the very wrong area of town for someone with a rather unsubtle car, and landed bang in the middle of a full-on street party with tables and trees and houses all bedecked in blue and red ribbons in honour of the UEFA cup (I assume. Hell, maybe it always looks like that - I've never driven there before...)

In a bid to not look like a rampant football hooligan or a boy racer I've been trying to girlie-fy my banger, and Mr Hunter found the perfect sign for the back windows:

Of course, I think this is a little overblown for little old me, but I suppose people should be warned just in case I happen to be naughty in the future... ;)